216. How to Rewire Your Brain to Defeat Depression, with Kelsey Aida and Lynnsey Robinson

Jeremy: [00:00:00] Do you ever feel stuck in negative thought patterns? Like no matter how hard you try, you just can't seem of a funk.

Zach: Today we'll share the simple things you can do that can retrain your brain to look for the positives and develop gratitude so you can get out of your own way and stop feeling like shit all the time. Like me.

Jeremy: So Zach, you and I, we've, we've been in our own funks lately as we have prominently displayed on the show in, in ways that I don't think we really have in years. so that's been really interesting and we've been hearing from a lot of people, uh, with a lot of support. That really means a lot.

can do that. Uh, you can reach out to us through our website, the fit mess.com. our guests today have had battles of their own, including, you know, loss of purpose, loss of identity, depression, limiting [00:01:00] beliefs, all the stuff that so many of us struggle with day. All those garden variety traumas that plague so many of us, they've lived through it and they've come out the other side stronger and empowered to help others do the same. 

Zach: That's right. Some of the things that we've talked about on the show recently is our own battles and the ups and downs. I have been struggling for a little bit.

Work's been tough. Life has been tough. All the things have been tough. Like just lots and lots of things. You know, any, any one of them? Not a super huge deal, but you put them all into the same pot and you turn the burner on high and you've got a recipe for, ,

catastrophe,

Mm-hmm.

.

And things are better. I mean, , . The problems are still there. The work stress is still there. All the things are still there. But instead of, you know, just living through that and feeling like a victim and not dealing with my shit, I've been working on, time for myself, making sure I'm getting the exercise I need, the mental exercise, I need, the meditations, all the breathing, all the things, all the things that [00:02:00] we talk about, all the things that I know and love that keep me sane and healthy.

And that's it, man. Like you, you gotta put the work in. Like you don't just get magically happy overnight. You gotta work on it. And it's a choice you wake up with every single day. And you know what? For a couple of days I made the wrong choice where I was like, you know what?

I'm gonna feel like shit today. I'm not gonna go to the gym. I'm not gonna meditate. I'm not gonna do these things because woe is me. You know what? I made a different choice. Now we're better. Now I'm better. I'm happy. I'm smiling. Shit's still there, but you gotta make that choice, man. You can't live like that.

Jeremy: I, and I don't wanna speak for you here, but I know for me, when, when I, you know, I was sharing pretty vulnerably, some, some struggles I was having, you We've talked bunch that like complaining whining about it has its place, but it also has an end.

Zach: Mm-hmm.

And 

Jeremy: there, the purpose of it, to just get it off your chest, to give it space, to give it a place to land [00:03:00] is powerful.

But without taking the important next step of, how am I gonna fix it? It, it kind of becomes, uh, a cyclical thing that you do over and over again. So you have to go the sessions like you and I have shared with the intention of I need to find a way out either 

Zach: through. 

Jeremy: Just making space in my head to think something else other than these horrible thoughts or to hopefully get some feedback from, you know, a, a trusted advisor that can help me a little differently.

Zach: And you gotta go even a step further than, how am I gonna get out of this? , I will listen to anyone vent and complain about anything for a while, so long as what comes out of their mouth when they're done venting is, and here's what I'm going to do about it.

Mm-hmm.

Not find it, like you just pick something and you do it, and if that doesn't work, you do something else.

If that doesn't work, you do something else, but just complaining and not doing anything about it, what's the definition of insanity? 

Yep.[00:04:00] 

Okay. So since I've picked myself back up and done all the things that I've wanted to do, our guest today, the name of their show, high Vibing It. I love that. So, like I, as I've been picking myself back up and doing all the things that I need to do, like I've been walking on around the house going, oh, I just high vibed it.

Like I'm getting myself back up there. I love the name of the show.

And, and it's a great show, 

Jeremy: especially the one I was on you, because for some reason you couldn't attend. But

Zach: well, the, the vibe on that one was definitely higher for sure.

Jeremy: Uh, but our that and Kelsey, Ida and Lindsay 

Zach: Robinson. Together, they help people 

Jeremy: unlock their full potential by clearing limiting beliefs, aligning their energy, and creating intentional, empowering mindsets. we started our conversation by asking Kelsey 

Zach: about her own claim that 

Jeremy: she has conquered depression. had to know did it. 

Kelsey: I think I put it in that verbiage because it really felt like a win when I was able to dig myself out of the hole because the depressive [00:05:00] episode started in my late teens, early adulthood, and it was really like the perfect storm of hormonal imbalance, not knowing how to process my feelings, not having like deep intimacy with other people in my life, like having people around, but not Having like the deep connection that I needed and I was basically really injured.

I was on track to be a professional dancer, but I hurt my back. I hurt my hips. And so like my whole life goal was like basically crushed. And I fell into this depressive episode for like three years and it happened slow. So you don't really notice, but then like one day you're like, what happened to me? I used to like things.

I used to like life. I used to have hobbies. I used to like people. And now everything's just. Miserable and horrible and I want out, , so in the depths of the despair, I was like, I have two choices here. I can figure out how to enjoy my life again and get better or I can probably just be on the timeline of suicide.

Like nobody wants to live like [00:06:00] this forever, including me. So like, I'm going to get out or I'm going to figure it out. So I kind of said an ultimatum to the universe and I was like, universe. What's a home girl got to do to get some help around here, like send the resources, send the perspectives, the information, the healing, the people, whatever I need to get better.

Like I am ready to learn how to like really thrive in life and enjoy it to the max. And, , of course, as I asked, my prayer was answered and. I was able to find the right help, the right podcasts, the right perspectives, the right books, the right teachers to honestly change my lifestyle and my mindset and get better that way.

Because I was kind of anti medicine at the time, not that I am for everyone in all cases, but I wanted to do it like, The achiever hardcore way, like get yourself out of the depression type way. And I was able to with the right, , mindset shifts and spiritual tools. And, , really something that helped me the most was starting [00:07:00] a gratitude practice because it helped me to rewire my neural pathways, to look for everything that was right, everything that was working, things that I could be grateful for, even though I didn't feel grateful for anything in the beginnings, I was like wanting to die.

So yeah, 

Lynnsey: did that answer your question? That was a good 

Kelsey: answer.

Jeremy: Yeah. I am curious. I don't want to dwell too much on this, but can you talk a little bit about the tools, like what were the actual applications that you used to dig

Kelsey: yeah. So one was actually processing my feelings and getting in touch with the sadness instead of trying to avoid avoid, push it away, suppress it. I was just exploring like, okay, what am I actually sad about? And like validating the part of me that was really upset and allowing myself to process that through tears, through movement, dancing, like that looks different for everybody, but processing the sadness, validating that, allowing it to exist, not Judging it and not making it mean anything.

Right. Cause it's very different to be like, I'm [00:08:00] experiencing a depressive episode. I'm really depressed versus like, I'm a depressed person. And that means like, I'm going to be miserable forever. Right. So not attaching those negative meanings to it, just letting the sadness live because emotions know how to process themselves.

So doing that. By myself, but also with facilitators because it's hard when you're new to emotional practices. So emotional practices like that for processing and healing, the gratitude practice, a lot of meditation, , a lot of movement, physical movement, sunlight's important for me, diet, like literally from every aspect.

I was like, okay, we got to revamp the system. 

Zach: Well, that sounds like an awful lot of work, personally, I mean, I'm just saying it's it's a lot. So, , you know, I kind of want to kick it over to Lindsay and, you know, talk about mindset a little bit like you've got to get yourself into a different headspace in order to go down those roads, right?

Lynnsey: Yes, and just kind of. When you're in that [00:09:00] space that Kelsey describes, I mean, we've all kind of been there to some extent of that. Like, what do I even do? Like, what do I, how, what, what do you mean? I just want to lay here, which, you know, can also be therapeutic to an extent, but at some point just doing, I think the best way to start would be just to like, put your feet on the floor.

Okay. And now what do I do? I actually just put out an Instagram reel and I don't ever do this. Kelsey knows, but I was sharing like this one really hard day that I had. I woke up and I was just like, I don't want to do nothing. I just, I'm so, I feel so heavy and I know that depression is different, but we all have days and I just put out, here's what I did.

I stood up, I brushed my hair, I washed my face. I ended up stretching because that moves, moves energy, anything to move the energy and it doesn't have to be big. I mean, what Kelsey's describing sounds like a lot, but it really is just a lot of very small. Things that we can all begin to do. And when you can start small, [00:10:00] they lead to like, Oh, I actually feel a little better.

Maybe I could go take a walk outside. Oh, that felt really good. Maybe I can do some exercise or listen to some music that I really like. First waking up you the thought of putting on music or like dancing. No, no, thank you Yeah, but I think the key is one 

Kelsey: moment at a time Yeah Yeah Do one thing and that 

Lynnsey: leads to the next one moment at a time and you will find your mindset kind of Expanding you'll find your willingness to do better and better things Getting better and better and the thing that I love about subconscious work We all do conscious work all the time, but we know we're doing it The thing with subconscious work is you don't know that a change is being made until you find yourself up against the same situation that you used to have all the time, but now you're thinking differently.

Now those neuropathways are taking a different route, a better feeling route, that you didn't even know how it happened or when it happened, but because you were taking these small steps and because you kept doing the conscious work, that [00:11:00] became subconscious. And it doesn't really. Feel hard anymore. I mean, it always kind of feel feels hard, but the hardest stuff begins to feel easier.

You get better shocks on your car.

Jeremy: Those, uh, those small steps that you're talking about, I, I've used this analogy before, so I'm going to, you know, sound like a dad here for a minute. Have you guys watched, uh, have you seen Frozen 2?

Lynnsey: Of course, I've got kids.

Jeremy: So when Anna is, is in the cave and she thinks Elsa has died and everyone has, has, you know, her world has crashed.

Lynnsey: Yes.

Jeremy: There has never been a more accurate depiction of what depression feels like for me. Like I was sobbing. I was like, oh my God, I feel so seen right now. Like, this is so incredible how they captured this. And how she starts talking about just doing the next right thing became my mantra after that was just like, whenever I'm in that state, it's just like, what is the next thing I can do that moves me forward out of this?

Because every part of your being, no matter how much, you know, how many, how full your toolbox is of all of the walks and meditations and [00:12:00] lifting and cold therapy and all the stuff, you're just like, it's not worth it. What's the point? Why, why I'm going to be like this forever. Lindsay, that's where I want to stay with you with the, sort of the, the wiring underneath and, and what you're able to do to help people sort of unravel that, to, to move through that and, and to find a way to just start doing the next right thing when every part of their being says not to.

Lynnsey: Well, yes, and I'm going to go back to kind of why subconscious work is so powerful any any kind of subconscious work, and I'm going to give a few examples because it's not always Hypnotherapy. That is a very good one. That's a great one. You're in a nice, dreamy, floaty state. You're very receptive. Your subconscious is, you know, ears perked up listening to everything and taking it in.

, other subconscious work could be like, if you wake up in the first 30 minutes of your day and the last 30 minutes before you fall asleep, those are what we call the magic 30 minute windows where your subconscious is very [00:13:00] receptive and awake. So any kind of work that you're doing in those magic windows .

It has a higher likelihood of getting into your subconscious versus, , the middle of the day 2 p. m. when you've just had your second cup of coffee, , but, , if you're doing anything in those, in those windows, it's very potent, , affirmations because, well, affirmations, if you're writing them down, and if you're using the right way to do them, Kelsey and I know we're talking about this all the time, but people that kind of just, Okay.

recite out loud, like, I am, I don't know, thin. I am healthy. When you don't believe it, sure, it's not doing nothing, but your subconscious knows that you don't believe it. So it's like, but what are we even talking about? But if you were to say something like, every day I become healthier in every way, or I am open to my most healthiest state of being, that just feels different.

It feels like, oh, okay, well, we can get on board with that. It's like cracking the door of possibility versus like, running through when you know that it's not [00:14:00] true. Your, your mind, your body, your subconscious knows that you're lying and it's going to react that way. So it might feel harder. So finding the right way to word affirmations is very important.

Also writing them down. Handwriting is a direct line to your subconscious mind. , it's something that we do without thinking about it. It is a, by definition of subconscious behavior and automatic behavior. So if you're writing these things down, that's why journaling is so important. But if you're writing things down, it just kind of.

Gets that direct communication a little bit, , more, substantial, I guess? It, it, it works. It just works. So write it down. Write it down is a lot, it's a lot easier and it feels, you can feel the shift versus like, I am healthy! You know, write it down. Maybe write it down 

in a 

Jeremy: I'm not. Every part of me knows that's nonsense. Yeah,

Lynnsey: Or, yeah, or maybe you're just not the healthiest that you want to be, but that's what you need to say. I am becoming the healthiest version of me. I'm becoming healthier every day, or I, I feel my most authentic self more and more every day, versus like, [00:15:00] I'm 100 percent there right now. Anyway, so, so that's one, uh, really powerful way to work with your subconscious.

, meditation is, can be another form of hypnosis if there's an objective. So if you're doing a guided meditation where there's an objective of feeling healthier, that's hypnosis. Sorry, it just is. Not sorry, actually, because hypnosis is fantastic. But, uh, any, any kind of, like, trance or meditation or, or hypnosis or trance like state that you can get yourself into to kind of reinforce things that you'd like to believe, focusing on your self talk and the thoughts that you're giving yourself every day, HUGE with subconscious work.

If you can focus and, like, observe the thoughts that you're having about yourself, about your situation, how you feel about that, and dig into, like, does that feel good? If it doesn't feel good, what can I say, or how can I... Change that wording to feel better. What would I like to believe instead? And just observing it.

really without, again, without judgment because that's a cycle that we don't want to get [00:16:00] into. We don't want to judge ourselves for judging ourselves. Um, but just observing without judgment and kind of trying to find something that feels better to you will begin. Like, this is all beginning to rewire your brain.

That's what we're doing. We're just rewiring the old path that you've trodden thousands of times. That feels like crap. We know what that feels like. Let's try this and see how it goes because it's just, just way better that way. 

Zach: so I love all of that.

I mean, I had one myself where I was like, I'm going to be richer every day, but I forgot to add on my bills. We're not, we'll not get more expensive. So that didn't work well. Yeah, I know you got to dial it in. Um, so I kind of want to shift a little bit. I want to hear more about your podcast, , high vibing it, . I love the title. I love the name. It's fantastic. I want to know who came up with it and how did you guys meet? And get together like how did this all start? 

Lynnsey: It does start with me. I'm not going to brag about it. But it is it is kind of like, but it was all me.

And I started 

Kelsey: it. 

Lynnsey: So 

Jeremy: know how much it hurts to pat yourself on the [00:17:00] back. I do it all the time. It's just you start to get sore. It's hard.

Kelsey: well, 

Lynnsey: and the thing is, I was very reluctant. So in 20 I'll just a very short story version of it as I hired a business coach in 2017. And she's like, you have to do you. A speaker summit, you have to get all these speakers on a panel, you gotta do this three day long thing, and I'm like, no. Don't want to.

Don't like it. Don't, don't want to do it. But she's like, you have to do it. So I, I looked for experts and I really wanted to find somebody that talked about manifesting. And, cause that was like a huge thing, uh, theme. So I found Kelsey. She's like, I don't know. She asked me to this day, like, how did you find me?

I was like, I don't know. I Googled it. Manifesting coach. Your blonde bob with red lipstick popped up on my screen. That's exactly what it looked like. And, uh. I was like, she looks fun. And we immediately, like, became really close. Like, just in that one We couldn't stop talking. We couldn't 

Kelsey: stop talking. 

Lynnsey: And so, I knew that she was, like, my people, and we became very fast [00:18:00] friends.

Anyway, fast forward to, like, a year later, I get asked to do, like, this radio show. You know, they do that thing, like, what could you talk about forever if you had a microphone? I was like, well, subconscious, hypnosis, all the things, mindset. And I was like, I don't, they're like, okay, well, let's give you a show.

I was like, no. Again, nope. Don't want to do it. Really don't like it. And then I was like, can I do it with a co host? And I'm like, yeah, of course you could. She's immediately the person I talked to, and I was like, now, Kelsey, you take over and tell them, like, how I acted, cause this is all her, for sure. 

Kelsey: She doesn't like the spotlight.

So nothing you could tell because you're not shy anymore, but she used to be like, Oh, I have to show up on video. People can hear my voice. I hate it. Everything about it. Horrible. Right. So she was like, not about this show idea. And we had been friends for a while now. And of course, in my. Manifesting ways.

I was already in the process of manifesting my own podcast, but it just hadn't like been the right opportunity But it was written down at somewhere that I was gonna have a podcast and whatever And so Lindsey comes to me and she's like, hey, they want me to do this show But like I'm not really down but they [00:19:00] said I could have a co host like if you want to do it with me I would consider I was like, oh my gosh, here's my podcast.

We totally got to do it 

Lynnsey: girl. Like it's here It's happening. I believe her words were Lindsey. We're doing it And I was like, 

Kelsey: okay, obvious opportunity that ever presented itself. Yeah. So we did our show and at first it was live, which was fun. And we had like people call in and stuff. It was like nerve wracking, but good.

Cause we got good at it really fast for having to do it live, like having that pressure. And then eventually we left the network that we were on so that we wouldn't have to like pay basically like a mortgage every month to like have this show and provide this information to people. And then we've been on our own for a couple of years now and I think we're like 200 or something episodes in and every Every week, we're just helping people to live their best life, love themselves, manifest their dreams, get into their mindset.

anything that has to do with wellness, spirituality, personal development, health, uh, those are great topics. Aliens. Don't forget [00:20:00] aliens. 

Lynnsey: Sometimes, 

Kelsey: I, I bring 

Lynnsey: people on and I'm like, you know, we gotta talk about aliens. Kelsey's like, okay, fine, we'll talk about aliens. Galactic Federation. 

Kelsey: Yeah.

Jeremy: It's a hot topic right now. It's a hot topic.

Zach: So how is your show, , helping both of you , is it helping you stay accountable? Are there things that are happening in your life where you're like, Oh my God, that's exactly what I needed to hear today.

And, and connecting in that way. 

Lynnsey: Oh my gosh, Kels, how many episodes have we done where we're like, I just don't, I'm just so like in a funk and you're just like, just press record. We'll just start talking by the end of the episode. We're like, 

Kelsey: So energized. 

Lynnsey: Yeah, on top of the world. 

Kelsey: Yeah, it definitely has been something I used to look at myself as someone who wasn't consistent, which, I don't really know why I had that perception of myself, because I have been consistent with things throughout my life, but, so this is a whole People on our show have gotten us into human design and my human design is a manifesting generator and manifesting generators are notorious [00:21:00] for like switching paths, having multiple careers, doing a lot of stuff like masters of all trades, like we don't narrow down, right?

So I used to judge that about myself a lot and be like, Oh, I always quit things, move on to something more exciting, or I always do something new. Doing the show for so long each week showing up every Monday to record and produce and publish a show Has definitely helped me see myself as a more consistent person who has like more follow through Not that I didn't but I just didn't see that about myself I think until the podcast and we're always on the podcast like asking for a friend But really, you know, like just getting free coaching sessions from like our guests.

Jeremy: There's again, this all sounds very, very familiar. I have, you

Lynnsey: Yeah, I definitely to speak to to kind of what Kelsey was saying to like I've noticed about me when I started the podcast and even when I was doing the events because what happened for me was I was doing in person sessions in North Hollywood, California for a really long time.

Then I [00:22:00] moved here to Las Vegas and I did not want to see clients in person. I just wanted to do online. So I was essentially relaunching an entire business because I did not know what I was doing. in the internet space at all, and I, I noticed about myself that what you're taught when you learn, when you kind of become a professional hypnotherapist, at least where I went, was like, do not bring yourself into the room, stay very professional, do not talk about yourself, don't even look at them, you know, just be, be that person for them, hold space for them, and I completely attached myself to that in a way that like, I didn't even know what message I was giving people.

Like, I didn't even know who I was as a, as a healer, as a helper, as a facilitator. I was just like, what do you need me to be? What do you want me to do? And I think that by reluctantly showing up every day, especially live, there's something about live that really, like, throws you into the deep end. You're gonna say some stupid shit, and then you're gonna have to just live with it.

Like, it just happened. Good luck with your life now. [00:23:00] But like, you, you really do have to kind of just... role with it. And it really helped me to not only roll with it, but embrace that. I'm going to say stupid shit sometimes. And it's just, that's the way that it's going to be. So if you like me, awesome. If you don't like me, that's cool.

And I've found that people that come to me now already know the kind of person I am and like that person. So they are even more trusting of me, even more embracing of like who I am as a person so that I can do my best work with them. So I just, I feel like for me, it's like I've embraced. My self and my professional self and they've kind of become one at this point where before I tried everything I could do to keep them separate and I think there is a space for that and a time for that, but it just did it does not work in for me in this works much better.

So I think that that's definitely part of the podcast that did that for me a lot. A lot of it is.

Jeremy: two things you both said there connect for me. And one is just that idea of letting go of all the stories you tell yourself that, you know, [00:24:00] are just not true. They're just stories you believe because some somewhere you pick them up. And for me, one of them was like, you can't do anything unless you're perfect at it unless you're awesome.

And I have I have grown so much in the last really the last few years to embrace it. I don't care what the outcome is. I'm just going to keep taking steps forward and keep bumping into things that are wrong and find the right thing that way. Because otherwise I'm still sitting back at the starting line, waiting to figure out something with, with no clue of which way to go.

So I love all that we are out of time. So I need to just ask quickly, uh, where can we learn more about both of you, uh, your shows and the work you guys offer?

Lynnsey: Kelsey, 

Kelsey: you go first. Okay. Yeah. So you can find us. We both have websites. Mine's Kelsey Aida. com. Lindsay's is Lindsay Robinson. com. So just our names. if you search high vibe in it, drop the G we're too cool for that. Three separate words. High vibe in it is the podcast. So that's where you can go for free.

Awesome conversations every week. Um, that's probably the best place to find both of us. And we're also on social on [00:25:00] Tik TOK and on Instagram, just our names, Kelsey Aida and Lindsay Robinson.

Jeremy: And you were both kind enough to have me on the show, not Zach, of course, because he, he, he had other big, big deal things to do, but I had a great time on your show. So we'll make sure we link, uh, the, your show and all of yours, all this stuff in the show notes here.

Zach: just, just like the G, I was too cool 

Jeremy: it was 

Zach: Too 

Kelsey: cool!

Jeremy: Way too cool.

Kelsey: It was a great episode about if you need motivation in life for things that you know you need to do or you know you want to do, but you're just not doing them. So if you need to get motivated, it was a great episode. 

Lynnsey: And it was recent, so you don't have to scroll very far.

Thank you guys so much for having us.

Zach: Our thanks to Kelsey, Aida And Lindsay Robinson from the High Vibing IT Podcast, you can find their podcast, including the episode that Jeremy . Was on that. I wasn't which you, which I mean, because I'm not on it. You could probably give it six stars if you could, but you can find all of that information by visiting the show notes for this episode@thefitmess.com.

And Zach, 

Jeremy: for me, that was really big takeaway from this conversation of all of the things we talked [00:26:00] about. But it's the simple little things that over time make difference, like journaling, gratitude, you know, if stuck, you just need to shake shit up, do one thing different today that is the next right thing toward feeling better to reaching that goal. So again, this is the kind information that we on this show a lot. It's, it's the simple When you come to a podcast like this, you're looking for that, that groundbreaking new idea, that thing I haven't tried 

Zach: yet. odds 

Jeremy: are it is simple like keeping a or a gratitude 

Zach: practice. I mean, these little things seem insignificant 

Jeremy: until you do them a little bit every day for a long time. Then you can look back and really see the difference that they've made.

Zach: Yeah, those little things can be groundbreaking. , looking back at the last 25 years of my life, , the couple of things that I've been doing for 25 years, like, I am completely different person because of that. So little things.

And you know what, you know what's great about those little things. If they don't work, you try a different little thing and you really didn't invest a whole lot of time[00:27:00] 

Jeremy: So, yeah, 

Zach: if you're feeling stuck, it's 'cause you're 

Jeremy: doing again. a different result. Try different no 

Zach: matter how

or, or you're standing in a tar pit like that, you'll be stuck in for sure.

a while. There's not 

Jeremy: a lot I can do to help you 

Zach: there. Sorry that

Yeah. Like small little changes, or, I mean, you might wanna just try screaming louder.

all 

Jeremy: right. 

Zach: Well, as four podcasters. We 

Jeremy: geeked is to do of work to help people to make big changes in their lives. We talked a lot more about that in the bonus clip from this interview. You can get that in the newsletter, which you can subscribe to@thefitmess.com, and that's where you'll find another new episode from us in just a few days. Thanks for listening. We'll talk to you soon.

Zach: See everyone. ​ [00:28:00]