We all have dreams and ambitions for our future selves. As young boys, many of us fantasize about becoming pro athletes, rock stars, or superheroes saving the world. But reality does not always align with those boyhood dreams. Life throws obstacles, traumas, and hardships at us that can shatter our sense of self and send us into a downward spiral.
This was the case for my recent podcast guest, Jared Ganem. From childhood, Jared’s dream was to become a pro wrestler and headline WrestleMania. He dedicated over a decade to making this dream happen, sacrificing relationships, health, and finances in the process. He made it to tryouts for the WWE and was convinced his dream was finally coming true.
But in one devastating moment, the head of WWE talent told Jared his dream was over before it began. Despite having the skills and passion, he was told “life’s not fair” and to give up on this dream.
This earth-shattering news sent Jared reeling emotionally. He lost his sense of purpose, identity, and self-esteem attached to this one singular dream. Without warning, he had to redefine his whole reason for being.
In the following years, Jared’s life spiraled out of control. He gained 80 pounds, racked up over six figures of debt, went through a painful divorce, and found himself living penniless in his parent’s Florida condo. He became clinically depressed and saw no light at the end of the tunnel.
But eventually, Jared realized that he needed to radically change his mindset and condition to pull himself out of this pit of despair.
He began mapping out the root-level psychology of why he was stuck in self-sabotage mode. Jared came to find that the biggest obstacle was his limiting self-beliefs, emotional trauma, and childhood conditioning that shaped his identity and purpose.
Jared created a 7-level model of human consciousness and the potential to understand where men get stuck:
- Purpose
- Identity
- Psychology (Beliefs & Values)
- State (Emotions & Energy)
- Skills & Resources
- Actions & Habits
- Environment & Conditioning
Most people approach growth and change from the bottom up. They think accomplishing more tasks, gaining more skills, or shifting their external environment will solve everything.
But lasting change must happen from the top down. Without healing our emotional trauma, upgrading our beliefs, connecting to our purpose, and shifting our identity, no external actions will ever create a transformed life.
We have to radically recondition our minds by uprooting negative thought patterns and ingrained neural pathways that shape our behaviors. This allows new habits and mindsets to sink in rather than hitting constant internal resistance.
Jared had to brutally analyze all the stories, assumptions, and self-talk that did not serve him. He got clarity on childhood events and adoption trauma that made him feel unworthy. He could finally believe in his inherent value by consciously healing these past wounds.
The key lesson here is not to allow your conditioning or past to determine your potential or future direction. You get to write the story of your life. Even if you endured pain, you can now choose how to transmute it into wisdom and fuel for growth.
Jared tapped back into his deepest desire to inspire people and create positive change in others’ lives. He realized wrestling was just the vehicle but that purpose transcended any singular career ambition.
He rebuilt himself mentally, physically, emotionally, financially, and spiritually. Today Jared runs a thriving business teaching men the principles of self-mastery. He lives debt-free and empowered by his conscious purpose and aligned identity.
You can escape any rock bottom pit by dedicating yourself to personal growth and mindset work. Limiting beliefs are not fixed truths. Trauma can be healed. You can unlock levels of potential and purpose you never imagined.
The first step is acknowledging where your psychology and emotional state currently reside. Then you can consciously rebuild yourself piece by piece. Rewire thought patterns, release repressed anger, uncover your true values. Soon you will embody the identity and purpose you were meant for all along.
It is never too late to become the hero of your own life story. Flip the script and start writing the next positive chapter today.
