How To Tap Into Inner Calm, Develop A Positive Mindset And Heal From The Stress That Is Holding You Back With Sara Raymond

[00:00:00] Zach: why Are you doing what you're doing? It's a simple question that for many is not simple to answer. That was the case for our guests this week. 

[00:00:08] Jeremy: Sarah. Raymond was doing all the things that she was supposed to be doing, but still found herself unsatisfied and looking for more. Maybe you can relate today. We'll talk with her today. We'll talk with her about the tools she used to get out of what she calls the I'll be happy when cycle,

[00:00:23] and they may be able to help you to 

[00:00:24] This is the fit mess conversations with world-class experts in the fields of mental, physical, and emotional health. And this episode 

[00:00:33] Sara Raymond: the past is kind of sticky and it draws us back to it over and over and over again.  If we don't look at it and understand it, it's going to keep drawing you back until you deal with it. And once you've dealt with it, then you have the freedom to go for. 

[00:00:52] 

[00:00:52] Now, here are your hosts, Zach and Jeremy. 

[00:00:54] Zach: Welcome to the fitness brought to you by athletic greens. Thanks for listening while you're doing whatever it is that you're doing right now. I'm Zach, he's Jeremy. We've been through all kinds of struggles and ended up stronger because of them. And we want to help you do the same. So if you're sick of your own shit and you're ready to make a change, you, my friend are in the right place. 

[00:01:13] Jeremy: When I lose 20 pounds when I make more money, when I get a new job, when I meet the right partner, how many times have you said to yourself? I'll be happy when only to find yourself immediately looking for the next thing for gratification.

[00:01:27] Zach: Uh, the number of times I have said I'll be happy when only to reach it. And I can't remember a time having reached one of my I'll be happy wins. And being happy for more than half a day at the most like it is so short-lived and then you're like, and what's next. And honestly, most of the time, whenever I was like coming close to one of those goals, like even a promotion at work. But, you know, you're going to get a promotion, right. And then it officially happened and your paycheck changes like, you know, a month in advance. So by the time you actually get the promotion for me anyway, the excitement's gone and I'm already looking for the next one. So. 

[00:02:15] Jeremy: That's the, that's the poison pill of goals. Right? We put so much emphasis on reaching these, these imaginary lines that we draw for ourselves. That the growth and the lessons are the things that are happening along the way. You got the promotion because of the skills that you acquired and the ability to do things well that had little to do with the actual goal.

[00:02:35] It was just the steps that you had to take. It was, it was the climbing of the ladder to get to the top. And that climbing is where the real progress happened. And it really had very little to do with what the actual goal was.

[00:02:47] Zach: It always amazes me looking back at, , the last 20 years of my life. And I can remember quite vividly, like my thought process 20 years ago. And, , things that, that I felt were important. And it truly was the goal Like the end state was.

[00:03:06] the important part. And there's so many things that I don't remember the journey and now, you know, fast forward now it's, it's really all about the journey for me.

[00:03:17] It's about the things I do, the little habits that I create and the, the, the little wins along the way. There's so much more important, so much more impactful for me now. And once I do reach my goal, which you know, I usually do get there. I now am more craving another goal so that I can have another journey.

[00:03:38] It's just mind boggling how that shift it's taken 20 years. Man it's so much, it's so refreshing to look forward to the journey as opposed to the new goal, because when I'm looking forward to the journey, I don't feel like a piece of shit for not having reached my goal already. 

[00:03:56] Jeremy: that's the thing when, when you're focused so heavily on the. It is focusing on the lack of it's the, I don't have this thing yet. And when you can just take a closer look at where you are now and what the next step is, you can see the progress along the way. We talk about this all the time. I need to be reminded of all of the things that I've done and the steps that I've taken to get, where I am to remind myself that I am capable of progress. I am capable of growth. I am capable of doing things because I'm always so focused on the thing. I'm trying to pull off the, the accomplishment I'm trying to reach.

[00:04:28] And I forget that I have a laundry list of success stories that are evidence that I can do. Hard things.

[00:04:34] Zach: But one way you make those hard things a little bit easier is having a balanced nutrition in your body. 

[00:04:42] Jeremy: That's why I started taking athletic.

[00:04:44] 

[00:05:36] Zach: . Our guest today is Sarah Raymond. She's a trained hypnotherapist, Pilates, yoga and meditation teacher and founder of the mindful movement. We started by asking her about her own journey that led to the creation of the mindful movement. 

[00:05:49] Sara Raymond: On paper, having this life, that seemed really great. It seemed like I checked all the boxes. I was doing all the things that I was supposed to be doing, but I found myself not really being satisfied and looking for more, whether it was the next training with my career or, you know, always comparing myself to other, other people and, and thinking that I hadn't done enough or I need to do more or.

[00:06:17] I always call it the I'll be happy when cycle and I never could really get where I felt like I wanted to go. , that being said, I started at practicing meditation and I learned more about hypnosis and that was when I really started to sound silly, but get to know myself, , I at the time was a business owner, a mom wife, you know, daughter, all of those labels.

[00:06:44] And I still didn't really feel like I wasn't. Like an authentic person. I didn't know who I was. So meditation and hypnosis really guided me along that journey. Uh, I think at the same time I had a, a mentor of mine asked me, , for the first time ever, like, why are you doing what you're doing? And that was a really hard question for me to answer.

[00:07:08] So again, I leaned on meditation and hypnosis practices to really understand the answer to that question as well. , and because I found so much value in meditation and hypnosis suicide, I think that's just my nature. I love things and I'm passionate about them and then I want to teach them. And so that's what brought me to the mindful movement today.

[00:07:31] Zach: . , as you were just thought you were telling your story. And I was just like, wow, that sounds like my story. Wow. That sounds like my story. Wow. That sounds like my story. Mentioned mindfulness meditation and gnosis, I want to ask you first about mindfulness and meditation and , if somebody doesn't know anything about those, like how would you describe, , mindfulness and meditation to someone.

[00:07:55] Sara Raymond: Uh, the, the short answer is I feel that mindfulness and meditation kind of as two separate practices, if you will, they're both about waking up to the experience of. So sometimes people are like, oh, you're just in a trance or it's just about relaxing. And that, you know, there is very relaxing for sure, but it gives you an opportunity to truly experience what life has to offer.

[00:08:28] , and I, I think. We tend to live from the neck up a lot. We're very logical analytical. Maybe not everyone is analytical, but you know, as adults, we have a logical brain that, , helps us to see the world. And we process our experiences through that. And meditation kind of lets you go below the neck and your feeling of your body and experience life in that way.

[00:08:57] Jeremy: mindfulness and meditation, th this whole lifestyle that those of us that discover it journey down, it seems like it comes to someone. They have to be at a point in their life when they're ready to be open to it, they have to be ready to sort of experience things that they can't explain. Be okay with the fact that there may not be an explanation and there may not be ever one in their lifetime.

[00:09:19] So I imagine these, this is a lot of who you interact with through your, your clients who, so who are these people that come to you and. Uh, and, and I guess what, what transformation can you offer them when, when they come knocking on the door and asking, you know, to learn more? 

[00:09:35] Sara Raymond: People come to me for many different reasons. Some have a similar story to my own and that , things are going fine, but they just want more, they want something that's more rich of an experience, more, , connected with themselves, with others to really understand themselves better. , So the transformation that might look like building confidence and self-love, and self-worth so that they can maybe not change any of the details of their life, but experience it more fully.

[00:10:12] When you said that this, this practice or this. Technique, if you will come to people when they're ready for it. Uh, I, that definitely happened for me because I was teaching yoga for at least 10 years before I really, , give to my toes into consistent meditation.

[00:10:32] , I was the, the yoga teacher who. Focused solely on the exercises, which is, I don't know how much you know about yoga, but it's really just one eighth of the whole experience. But like that's, that's what was important to me. And I said, people will just come to see me for a workout and that's what I was giving them.

[00:10:51] And then. You know, everything really turned completely around when I discovered meditation. And, , so I definitely embraced that and it showed in my teaching after that experience. 

[00:11:05] Zach: If they find this when they need it, , we kinda know what, and we know a little bit about the why of, of what changes need to be made.

[00:11:13] , I've found in my experience that it's, there's usually something else hidden underneath that the person has to process through. And , maybe you can talk about hypnosis in combination with meditation. But that's something that you do as well as like you help them find what that underlying cause of, of whatever it is they're looking for.

[00:11:32] Is can you talk a little bit about 

[00:11:34] Sara Raymond: that? Sure, sure. , the big difference in my opinion is that meditation is more a state of being. As I mentioned, it helps you to be aware of your, the full experience of your life.

[00:11:48] It's not changing anything. It's just simply acknowledging and being fully aware. And then on the other side, hypnosis is really about making a change. So there is going to be some perhaps positive affirmations that are included in a recording that would be made for you. There is definitely, like you said, kind of getting the, the cause underneath of the.

[00:12:16] So if we take, , let's say anxiety for an example, something that most people are familiar with had they experienced it themselves or not. They might know someone else who has had experience with anxiety. So in a session, we would look for the. Underlying cause. And the way we do that is we look at events from the past that have caused this individual to form a belief about themselves.

[00:12:44] And that might look something like, uh, they grew up in a house where, , one of their parents was an alcoholic and the other had depression and this might be an extreme case, but there was no certainty. Like they came home from school and they didn't know what state their parents were going to be in.

[00:13:03] It might be anger. It might be sadness. It might be, you know, let's go on a road trip or whatever that might look like. And so with this uncertainty, They developed a belief that, you know, safety and security or, , consistency is not available to them. And therefore they have this constant state of worry of like, okay, well, what, what catastrophe is going to come my way next?

[00:13:31] And, , then once you understand where that belief came from as an adult, you can realize that, okay, well, I'm not. At the mercy of my parents anymore. I'm an independent person. I can make choices for myself. I can control my environment. I can take steps to make sure that I feel safe and therefore, you know, those beliefs are, are not relevant anymore.

[00:13:58] They're not even necessarily true. And now I'm ready to, once I have that understanding, I'm ready to, for my. New beliefs that do lead me to the, , anxiety free life that I desire. 

[00:14:13] Jeremy: Okay. So one you just described me and Zack. 

[00:14:18] Sara Raymond: Like, 

[00:14:20] Jeremy: we're not just a, he, his was a much more extreme version, but I mean, you just wrote our story.

[00:14:27] Like that's us. That's, that's what got us here. That's what got us to this point. It's. Yeah, but, but, but well done. You're, you're dialed into something, uh, nice job. , something that I, that I heard, I think it, when I was researching for this interview, the idea that you just explored there.

[00:14:43] Somebody, , that was talking to you made a really interesting point about that childhood experience and how that sort of informs our perception of reality today. And they said something to the effect of. That experience comes from when you were 7 or 12 or whenever the thing happened.

[00:14:58] And we're still taking advice from that seven or 10 or 12 year old. And if you practically now went to a 7 year old for life advice, you might not take it as much as you take your own advice from the perspective of that child is I just think that that is true. I'd never heard it explained that way and that I just feel like it's a really powerful way to look at.

[00:15:21] Any of this stuff that we hang on to from our childhood and still allow it to control so much of how we behave. 

[00:15:27] Sara Raymond: Right. And I think that the, the science behind that, or the brain development that's really important to understand is that the part of our brain. Our logical, the prefrontal cortex isn't fully developed until like, I think they say around 25.

[00:15:44] So that's the part of our brain, that processes our experiences logically. So we can say know. Okay. I'm an adult. I don't have to rely on the opinions of my parents. I don't need their unconditional love or approval to be, , the amazing person that I know that I am, but as a child, that part of our brain is not fully developed.

[00:16:10] And so we don't have this filter at seven or 12 that says. This is true, or this is not true, or this is right, or this is wrong. And that's why, you know, they don't let people under 18 drink alcohol or boat. , but that part of our, that, that part of our mind that, that develops these beliefs. It's like, it keeps wanting to prove that those beliefs are true.

[00:16:41] So as we age into the time of our life, where we are able to filter our mind is still trying to show us that we're not good enough because that's what it, , it came to realize when we were seven or 12 or whatever age it was. Um, so, you know, hopefully you don't think that. Well, why not? Why not just fix it now that we're an adult and not take that advice anymore?

[00:17:07] Sometimes it's a little, uh, a little harder, like I say, like the past is kind of sticky and it draws us back to it over and over and over again. 

[00:17:18] Jeremy: So that's what I'm curious, how I, I still battle this. I know better logically. I know. Yeah, how do I shake that? Is the, is this going to be a lifelong process? Is this something that through hypnosis?

[00:17:30] I can, I can let go of more easily. What does someone do to, to let that go? 

[00:17:35] Sara Raymond: That's a very good question. I would say that it's not, it doesn't have to be a lifelong struggle or journey it could be. , but I think that our emotions will always. Sort of beat out our logic. So like logically we say, well, I'm a great person.

[00:17:55] Look at all these successful things I've done, but our emotions might still be saying, well, you're not good enough. So you better, , work harder. , do the next thing. Like I, like I mentioned before, I was always seeking the next training because I lacked the confidence that, you know, I was a good.

[00:18:14] Pilates and yoga instructor or I was a good mom. Uh, it was always just looking for some other expert advice, which I still do a little bit for sure. Um, but, , when you have the understanding that this belief that's driving, this unwanted behavior or issue is from a specific event. Like you can clearly see it in a state of hypnosis or sometimes it can happen through therapy or through, uh, coaching.

[00:18:46] but I find that in the state of hypnosis, because you're letting the logical part of your mind rest, it lets you more easily access those, that subconscious part of your mind where those beliefs are really stored. Uh, and then when you can see like, okay, well I had this event when. I was Seven years old. And my, I felt like my brothers were like bullying me or they were ignoring me.

[00:19:13] And I really just wanted to play with them, like seemingly simple event. But I felt like I was unwanted and unlovable. And then that stuck with me in the state of hypnosis. When you see that, and you can understand so clearly. That, that was how that belief was formed. Then it gives you the power. It's like that.

[00:19:36] That's the catalyst that understanding it gives you the power to then. Relinquish or let go of that belief. That's not true. I mean, now, you know, I get along great with my brothers. That wasn't really a true story about me, but was if they're listening, I love, but, but yeah, that's, that's how the process unfolds is you, you have this understanding and then you can let go of the past.

[00:20:10] And I'd like to use sort of a, almost like a ceremony. To really let go of it. So, uh, let's say I work with someone that is, , they're a garden or they love to spend time out in the garden. They love nature. They love being like in the woods then, , they're letting go. Ceremony might be indicative of like the leaves falling from the tree because it resonates with them.

[00:20:39] You know, I've had people that are like, I'm just going to take that out in the trash. I'm gonna put it in the trash compactor. I'm going to get rid of it. And then it's like, okay, that's the ceremony. , but I think that that can be really, really powerful and effective to then be able to move forward with what you do want.

[00:21:00] Zach: So I am so curious about hypnosis and. Uh, I personally don't have any experience with it other than what I've seen on TV, which is not, you're going to tell me if that's real or not. , but how do you get there? Like how do you get to that point where you can open up the door and look into the subconscious, like what's happening in the brain?

[00:21:21] How are you guiding it? And. And, you know, I've got a ton of followup questions, but like, you know, do you have to work with somebody or is it something you can do at home by yourself? 

[00:21:32] Sara Raymond: Well, first stage hypnosis is what you're describing when you see this on TV. And it is real. That is not at all the type of hypnosis that I practice, , in the session, whether you're working with me or you're listening to a recording, , .

[00:21:48] So right now we are alert. We are, , having a conversation we're being logical. And then when you go into hypnosis, you are shifting states of your brain waves. So you're in this relaxed state of your, of your mind. So in that state, it's not like you're in a trance, you are in a relaxed state and you have the, and this part is really important.

[00:22:18] You have the, the sense of being safe. So if you're working with a practitioner it's really important to. Be able to build a feeling of trust with that person so that, , it's almost like maternal in a way, like I would love for my clients all feel like they are being very well taken care of and seen and heard and safe.

[00:22:43] , and in that state, it allows you to, , Not bypass so much the logical mind, but you're, you're almost like letting it rest. It's like that part of the mind is like often the side of your, your experience, not really being fully present, it's not processing information. And when that part of your mind is at rest, then you can access the subconscious mind and you're you're you're away.

[00:23:15] You're just fully relaxed. It's like your nervous system is like, all right, we're safe. We trust the person we're with. And we're trusting that this process will unfold in a way that will benefit me. And then you have that ability to access the subconscious mind. 

[00:23:37] Jeremy: I've heard it described as sort of that point, right before you fall asleep, like you're, you're still kind of awake, but not all there.

[00:23:45] Sara Raymond: Yes. Yes. So that's very true. , same brainwave state. And, , you also will have, , The rapid eye movement, , and as a practitioner, I will look for that. So you kind of have the, I can't do it right now cause I'm awake, but that's like a fluttering under the islands. , so that's a good indicator.

[00:24:06] , and then you had asked, , if you need to work with a professional or if you can do it on your own, , You can learn self-hypnosis so you would learn how to, go through the induction process, which is basically just taking you from your alert state to your relaxed, , have not estate. , and then you can.

[00:24:26] Kind of self affirm the things that you want. So that would be a way to do it on your own. There are a generic recordings that I have on my YouTube channel that when I say generic, what I mean is that. Personalized. So like the affirmation statements or the, , the process is not necessarily specific to any one person.

[00:24:51] It's just about, say about confidence. And, , if you do go through that process and you hear something that's really not true, or it doesn't resonate with you, you'll just ignore it. So your mind can kind of filter through what, what does resonate with you. , but if you do want to work with. You know, a professional, then the experience becomes much more personalized and the type of hypnotherapy that I practice, as I had mentioned before, there's going to be some dialogue.

[00:25:23] So I'm going to be guiding your subconscious to look at those events from your past to help you understand. , how you develop the issue that you want to make a change from. And then the recording that you would listen to would be 100% personalized. So we can personalize everything from the induction process or like how you most effectively get into a relaxed state.

[00:25:52] , and to the. You know, the beliefs that you want, the visualizations you want, what makes sense? Like, like I like to put in, um, in the recordings, how you interact with the people in your life after you have made the change that you desire, what feelings and emotions you will have when, when you go through this transformation.

[00:26:17] , and that's how it really, I think. More effective because it, because it's personalized. 

[00:26:24] Zach: You're probably going to say it depends, but how often should we be doing this?

[00:26:30] Or is that wholly dependent on what you're trying to get out of it? 

[00:26:34] Sara Raymond: There's two answers to that question. The first is in terms of the sessions that you have directly with me or any other practitioner, that definitely depends on how you know, how intense the issue is. , how easily you go through the process.

[00:26:54] Generally, I like to see people between one and three times, depending on the, the depth of their experience, but then beyond the session, , I would recommend that the individual is listening to their personalized recording every day for at least.

[00:27:14] 21 days, three weeks. And that's a generalization only because that's what the science is saying. It takes that long to make a habit change, which if you read the studies on that, it's very interesting because it's like, sometimes it takes five days and sometimes it takes 60 and you know, this is the, the average.

[00:27:35] Jeremy: when it comes to this sort of exploration, looking into our past and where a lot of our previous, uh, beliefs and things come from something I hear, I think particularly from men is, well, I don't need to relive the past.

[00:27:48] I don't need to go back, man. I'm moving forward. Why is this important? How, because I don't want to encourage anyone to, to dwell in their pain, but I think that by visiting it and trying to change that relationship with it, it sort of lets go of some of that pain. So help help that guy. Who's hearing this right now going, oh, no way, man.

[00:28:08] I'm not, I don't, I don't need to live in the past. 

[00:28:10] Sara Raymond: Yeah. , I think exactly what you said is true. Right? You said that when you go back and. And you look at the path and you can understand it, then it lets you have that freedom. Like I always think of forgiveness as a process for the forgiver meaning.

[00:28:32] Let's say I am angry at a friend and they did some wrongdoing and I just can't stop thinking about it. I'm so angry. I, you know, it's really upsetting me, but my, I just keep my mind on it. It's like cycling through this anger. And if I were to just say that I forgive and like, let go of the anger. It's not.

[00:29:02] Condoning what that person did. It's not saying that what they did is fine and right, but it's saying I'm ready to stop being handcuffed to that event because of the anger. And it allows me as the forgiver to move forward and not be like tethered to it. And I know that's about someone else. In terms of forgiveness.

[00:29:29] But I think that our past is the same way. If we don't look at it and understand it, it's going to keep pulling us back. Right. It's like I said, it's very sticky. It's, it's going to keep drawing you back until you deal with it. And once you've dealt with it, then you have the freedom to go for. 

[00:29:53] Jeremy: That makes a lot of sense.

[00:29:54] And that's a beautiful place to wrap things up. I just want to ask quickly, where can we learn more about you and your work and find out more about what you have to 

[00:30:00] Sara Raymond: offer? Sure. Thank you. Uh, the mindful movement.com is kind of the hub for everything. If you search the mindful movement on YouTube, you'll find hundreds of videos there as well.

[00:30:11] So you could find like a generic hypnosis practice to just try and see what you think. 

[00:30:17] Jeremy: Our thanks to Sarah Raymond founder of the mindful movement. You can find links to her and her work in the show notes for this episode@thefitness.com some big takeaways for you in that interview. Number one, meditation helps with creating a state of being. It helps you to be aware of the full experience of your life.

[00:30:31] It's not changing anything. It's just simply acknowledging and being fully aware. Number two hypnosis is a tool you can use to make changes to the root causes of some of your underlying issues that you may not even be aware. And finally many of the blocks that we hold on to are rooted in traumatic events from our childhood, but we don't have to keep taking advice from our childhood selves.

[00:30:52] We can train our minds to think in a new way so we can act in a new way.

[00:30:58] Zach: I don't know. I do like to take advice from my childhood self because in a lot of ways I've devolved over the years. And I do believe that my childhood self is a lot more mature and intelligent than I am at. 

[00:31:11] Jeremy: I usually listen to him when he's like, Hey, let's get some ice cream. That sounds delicious.

[00:31:15] Zach: oh yeah. My favorite is Let's go run around on the street, like play in traffic.

[00:31:21] Jeremy: Let's go play in trap. Hey, is that a bear here? Kitty. Kitty.

[00:31:26] Zach: Yeah, that, that third point though, of the, , traumatic events from our childhood, I, I cannot stress how many times I have had to go down the road of, of examining those traumatic events and the impact that they've had on me as an adult. And, , as a 42 year old guy who I want to be a tough guy, No, you don't, you don't go back and look at your childhood events.

[00:31:54] You rubbed dirt on that. You move on,

[00:31:56] but no, that's not the case. You need to deal with that shit. And unfortunately, for me, there was a lot of shit that I had to unpack and I had to uncover and a lot of crying, a lot of therapy to like, deal with that stuff. But fuck, when you get on the other side of that, It is so freeing.

[00:32:16] You don't need to carry all that weight on your shoulders. So, you know, if you do have a traumatic childhood , that you're holding on to things as an adult, it's, it's worth its weight in gold to examine that, take a look at it and dump that stuff off. 

[00:32:32] Jeremy: Or at least pursue it and see if it is the root of what's holding you back because. So many times so many people we've talked to, that's the case. There's, there's something hidden deep in the past that needs to be processed because your body just stores that stuff and really negative ways and, and tends to hold you back,

[00:32:49] Zach: And at the very least you'll go back to your childhood and you. will remember something that you used to like to do. 

[00:32:56] Jeremy: such 

[00:32:57] Zach: maybe, maybe just, maybe you'll start doing that again. I remember that I really enjoyed playing with Lego. 

[00:33:04] Jeremy: ah, 

[00:33:04] Zach: like as an adult, I build Lego sets because I truly enjoyed it as a kid.

[00:33:09] Jeremy: cool. Look 

[00:33:10] at you. Look at the big brain on Zack.

[00:33:12] Zach: it's a kind of inexpensive hobby. Those things are pricey. Well, I am curious, , I've never been hypnotized, but I am really curious. Of all of our listeners, if anyone else has been hypnotized or has gone down that road. So if you have, , we would love to have you join us in our Facebook group and leave an account of your hypnosis experience.

[00:33:34] I would love to hear about it and there you can join other fitness listeners for monthly challenges, accountability to reach your goals and just an overall supportive community. And you can learn about the brand new mastermind program we're launching soon. We're calling it the fit mess method. It's a mastermind for a small group of people who want to collaborate, help each other grow and pursue goals that have been just out of reach for too long. 

[00:33:59] Jeremy: That link is also at our website, the fitness.com where we will be back next week with a brand new episode. Thanks for listening.