Prioritizing Self-Care: Filling Up Your Tank

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Have you ever gotten so frustrated with
your mental and physical health that you

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just throw the whole kitchen sink at it in
an attempt to fix

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This week we're going to talk about how
you shouldn't do that and why Zach is an

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idiot.

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Well, it's officially hours since I've put
any food in my mouth.

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All I've been drinking or eating is just
water.

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And of course, one cup of black coffee.

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So don't say anything wrong.

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I'm going to start with how these
conversations usually start between us

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when there's no cameras rolling.

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What the hell are you doing that for?

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That seems crazy.

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I just need a reset.

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the past, I had always done I'm doing a
three day water fast.

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And in the past, did it like once a
quarter and just took three days, nothing

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but water, let everything flush out.

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And it was always painful, but I always
felt awesome afterwards.

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And I haven't done it in like, I don't
know, 18, 19 months

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The other day, I mean, I've said I've
talked about it on the show a couple of

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times.

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Like I, you know, just the last six or
seven months, I've just been like out of

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my funk.

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I sick and with something bacterial and I
didn't take any antibiotics and really

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like threw me down a set of stairs.

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And now I'm back.

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But like I got out of all my old habits
and I just.

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I had enough last week, I need to get out
of my own way.

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I'm sick of my own shit, so I'm here
resetting it with a water fast.

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playing around with all kinds of vagus
nerve stimulation techniques to calm

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myself down, meditation, and reading.

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As we have talked about in the always
start small with little steps.

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And I guess that applies to everyone but
me because when I do it,

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you're doing it like the most extreme
thing I can think of, deprive yourself of

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food for three days and like do, like
start dabbling in all of the things.

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We do tell people to start small all the
time.

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And I have never followed that advice and
you know that.

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I all.

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I can say is 100 % authentically true

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I jump in both feet, arms, hands, head
first into whatever it is I'm diving into.

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And I have just felt so off for the last
few months and I just, can't do it

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anymore.

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So I'm just diving right back in.

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And the thing is, is like most of what I'm
diving back into, yes, so water fast is a

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little bit extreme, but like most of what
I'm diving back into is just stuff that

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was there commonplace seven or eight
months ago.

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So it's not as big of a lift as if I had
never done any of these things.

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So moving for the next 30 days, no rest
days.

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Like I'm just making sure I move in some
way, or form, whether that's a walk or,

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know, it doesn't have to be CrossFit.

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It doesn't have to be throwing heavy
weights around, but it's got to be

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movement in some way, shape or form.

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And I've just been so off my game lately.

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Work stress has been higher than normal.

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And while I'm

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really good at handling high pressure
situations, like even some high pressure

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situations still get me.

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So anyway, yeah, no, I'm not following our
own recommendation.

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I'm just, I'm like, I'm not eating
anything for three days, but water.

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But I do intermittent fasting most days,
so I feel a little hungry, but like

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nothing too extreme.

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Like my mood is pretty good.

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Everything's fine.

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Don't ask me that in 30 minutes, because I
might blow up at

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Exactly.

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A couple of things are you posted
something the other day on our Instagram

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page and I think Facebook too about the
doing a 30 day challenge.

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And so you alluded to that oddly enough I
think you and I are in a more similar boat

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than I think either of us realized between
the travel I did a few months ago and

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trying to reestablish a routine and then
adding some trail running to it.

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ended up getting an injury which was
compounded with another injury which I've

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since re -injured.

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And there's been a lot of

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sitting on my ass recovering and trying to
figure out what can I do, right?

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How can I still move?

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How can I still do something to not
completely break the habit?

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And, you know, my current injury is a back
injury, which fucks everything up.

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I can't I can't really go lift anything
because it hurts.

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I can't stand here for too long because
it's going to hurt.

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I can't sit here for too long because it's
going to hurt.

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So I have to I don't have one of the key
foundations that I need to manage my

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mental health.

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it's similar thing.

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I'm trying to go, what can I do?

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And for the most part, it's been water.

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If I can get in water where there's not
that compression on my spine and

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compression on my back, I can still I can
swim, I can move around.

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And so that's what I'm doing.

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Not a tremendous amount, but it's enough
that so far I've been able to keep the

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monsters in my head pretty quiet.

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But that's the root of all of this that
we're talking about.

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We're not sitting here telling anyone how
to live their lives.

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So hopefully you came to us because you
struggle with something.

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There's something in your head that some
story you tell yourself about what a piece

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of shit you are, why you're a victim, why
life's in your way, all the time.

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And so we just try to share, hey, would we
start feeling that way?

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Because I don't really feel like that most
of the time.

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But when I'm in this phase, when I'm not
able to use all of the tools that I've

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built to keep me sane,

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It gets harder and all of a sudden the
thing at work feels like it's my fault

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when it's not the fight that happened at
home that felt like it's my fault.

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But it's not like whatever whatever the
thing is, it's usually rooted in.

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I'm not doing what I need to do to take
care of myself.

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And so.

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to your point about what you are now
doing.

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Yeah, somebody hearing this is probably
gonna think that's pretty extreme.

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I wouldn't do that.

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I wouldn't suggest you do that.

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I would say the reason that I think you
can is because you have done this and

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more.

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So this feels like a small step for you.

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Anybody who's like never experimented with
any of this, I would never say, hey, step

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one, don't eat for three days.

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Yeah, no, absolutely not.

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mean that to your point, like I have done
this multiple times before.

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I know exactly what's going to go through
my head when I go to bed tonight, you

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know, and I know exactly how I'm going to
feel tomorrow.

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And I very purposefully started yesterday
because Sunday I need to do something that

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I need energy for.

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And it's currently Friday and I started on
Thursday.

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So I'm going to be able to

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eat again Sunday.

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And I timed it so that I'm going to eat
right before I have to go do the thing I

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have to do that's actually going to
require a little bit of energy.

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You

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So I know that I'm gonna be sapped of
energy tomorrow, right?

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Because my body's like, dude, where's the
food?

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Where's the Doritos you've been eating for
the last three weeks?

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I have to say this one thing.

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my girlfriend, you know, at her house, she
buys snacks and stuff for the kids and

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things like that.

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She gets Nutter Butters.

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I can't, I have no willpower against them.

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None.

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I only eat like five of them in one shot.

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Like I have no willpower.

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those things are dangerous.

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Dude, I will say it like, and I've
probably said this before, but I have

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realized for me it is cookies.

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I don't care what they are, if it's a
cookie.

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Like there is nothing easier to grab that
is more satisfying than eating a cookie.

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Bring in the cakes, bring in the ice
cream, bring in the Doritos, all that

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stuff.

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I can leave it for the kids.

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It's gonna be fine.

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You bring cookies in this house, get out
of my

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Right, even if it has dried fruit in it,
you're still gonna eat the cookie.

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Yeah, it doesn't matter if it is designed
as a cookie, it is going in my face.

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Yeah, I am.

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I am clearly on the same way with Nutter
Butters and there's a lot of them.

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So.

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yeah, there's like 80 in a pack or
whatever.

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So that's a 10 minute snack.

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As we're talking about it, my stomach just
growled.

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Give me another butter.

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That may be the fasting, I'm not sure.

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It could be.

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could

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So this is not a big deal for me.

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I just wouldn't recommend it for anyone
else.

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Like, know, start...

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If you're going to do fasting, start with
like an intermittent fast.

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you know, I talking to somebody like a,
you know, 16 -8 or something like that.

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Like, see if you can go 12 or 16 hours
and...

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Then move into 24 hours and maybe move
into 36 hours, but don't just jump into a

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36 hour fast.

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Unless you're stupid like me.

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There's lots of things that you can do for
self care.

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And it's funny that self care is something
we're talking about today because I was

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just I was driving around yesterday and my
the gas tank in the van was on E, right?

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And like trying to push it as far as I can
go.

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And, you know, we've always heard the
airplane analogy of the oxygen mask.

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Put it on yourself so can see the person
next to you, etc, etc.

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We've even shifted the conversation about
that to the champagne fountain.

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Right.

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Fill the one up on top so that it can
overflow to everyone below.

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But I think I like the gas tank analogy
even better because as a parent, I'm

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driving my kids everywhere all the time.

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And I'm constantly trying to see how far
can I go on this tank?

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Like, can I like, can I get it down below
the E line?

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I hate doing, I hate stopping to fill up
the tank.

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It's a pain in the ass.

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But I realized as I driving around
yesterday, I can do so much more for my

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family and take them so much farther when
the tank is full.

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So fill up the goddamn tank.

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Like, don't put yourself through the
stress of how much can I squeeze out of

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what I've got to barely get there and hope
everything goes OK.

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If you can stop and just fill up the tank,
stop and take care of yourself, you're

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going to be able to take care of everyone
else around you and help take them on

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their journey even farther.

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So that was just a little epiphany that I
had yesterday.

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I was like, as much as I hate stuff,
because because, by the way, could paying

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for for gas at a pump be any more
complicated?

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Maybe it's just me.

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I don't know.

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But every time I try to use the

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at the pump because god forbid I have to
speak to a human being it doesn't work and

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it pisses me off so I just I it's the hard
thing and I have to just pull up accept

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that it's probably not gonna work I'm
probably gonna have to go talk to somebody

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and that's super annoying to me but
anyways just fill up the tank take care of

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yourself and get everyone else around you
and yourself farther by taking care of

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yourself first

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Yeah, there's something about the gas tank
filling up.

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Like there's two types of people, right?

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There's the person who, it's below half a
tank.

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I better go fill it up.

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And then there's us who are like, well, I
might get five miles out of this on the

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gas station seven miles away.

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Hmm.

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What are we?

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There is something about filling up the
gas tank, even if the machine is working

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right.

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You simply just tap the card and you pump
the gas.

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There is something about it that drives me
insane that I'm just like, I don't want to

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do it.

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I just don't want to do it.

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It's probably more along the lines of
spending money for me, but because I don't

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know about you, but when I pull up to the
gas tank now, it's like 100 bucks.

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come visit us in Canada.

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So the other thing that I'm playing around
with is Vegas nerve stimulation.

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I don't know if you've seen anything on
this, I have, know, the Vegas nerve is the

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nerve that calms you down.

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It's your rest and digest nerve.

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we learned about this on one of our shows
a long time ago, but it is

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counterintuitive in that in order to...

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you know, activate that rest and digest
and that calm feeling within your body,

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you have to stimulate one of your nerves
and it's that nerve that you have to

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stimulate.

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So I've been looking online.

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There's all these cool tools now that you
can like, you know, put around your neck

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and it basically attaches to, it's, it
sends pulses and vibrations to your vagus

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nerve, like outside below your ears and

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We had a show a long, long time ago, I
think it was an essential oil

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That was actually episode number 70, which
is linked in our show notes for this

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episode.

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and I learned it there and I'll never
forget it because on my desk, where I work

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every day, this is not where I work every
day, I try and keep the podcast separate,

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I have a bottle of lime essential oil and
a bottle of cinnamon.

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And what you do, and we tried this on my
girlfriend and found out that she's really

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allergic to cinnamon, so if you're
allergic to cinnamon, don't do this.

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But what you do is you take lime essential
oil,

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and you just rub it behind your ear and a
little bit down your ear, just, you know,

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like that, you know, the bony thick tendon
part, just like cover that with lime

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essential oil.

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What that does is it opens up your pores
and then you put the cinnamon on and the

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cinnamon goes in and actually activates
your vagus nerve.

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And it literally you could you can feel
your heart rate start to drop.

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You can feel your breathing start to slow
down.

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You can feel the calmness like come over
you.

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I.

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The only thing I can equate it to is like
a Xanax kicking in.

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It's crazy.

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It's really crazy.

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I remember that episode where we talked
about essential oils.

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There's one and I still have it on my desk
because I clearly haven't used it enough.

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But it literally just smelling it does the
same thing.

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activates the same, the vagus nerve.

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And so for the longest time I carried that
bottle around with me because my kids were

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much younger and my stress level and my
ability to handle it was much, much

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different than it is now.

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But it was amazing how like I would be on
the verge of losing my shit and feel in my

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pocket, there's a tiny little jar.

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Smell it and I'd be like, okay, cool.

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And whether like, whether it is that
stimulation that does it, but it's

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just that that moment that moment of
separation between the stressor and your

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response.

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If you can sort of build something like
that in, think just having that moment

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that minute to have a beat and go, okay,
don't blow up.

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Don't lose your shit.

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And if you can have the physical response,
then it's a double whammy.

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Yep, absolutely.

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But there is, I mean, there is science
behind it.

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like, I mean, smelling it too, like that,
that yes, it will absolutely do that, but

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I don't think it's having a direct impact
on your vagus nerve and stimulating it the

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way like, you know, putting it behind your
ear is going to don't do too much though,

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because I did too much in like a week
once.

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And like I broke out into a rash and like
it was, it was a thing.

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but they do make devices now that you can
wear that,

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You know, the claims that they have on
them and I want to get ahold of one.

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Actually, we should probably reach out to
a couple of them and see if we can get

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them on the show, because I'd love to
learn more about it.

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But don't think I realized how stressed
out I was Things have creeped like just a

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little bit every day, a little bit more
here and there to the point where I'm, you

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know, really, really stressed out and I
have to do these things again, so.

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But the Vegas nerve stimulation devices, I
wanna get a hold of one of those and try

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that out because I can only go around
smelling like cinnamon for so long,

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it smells delicious.

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What's your problem?

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us.

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And it's so interesting to me how we
literally do a show on this stuff.

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And even I need to be reminded sometimes
of like some of the basic things that you

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got to do.

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We don't all have access.

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mean, I don't have access to a gadget, a
$300 gadget to wear around my neck.

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I do have, you know, cinnamon oil, but
that costs money.

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But there is a there's also like free ways
to do this stuff.

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And it just blows my mind that again, like
you and

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We talk about this stuff all the time.

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We do a podcast on this stuff all the
time.

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It's always front of mind.

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And even we forget about it.

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Just box breathe, man.

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Like you literally are, you have the
ability to breathe.

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You do, you know, box breath, inhale for
four, hold for four, exhale for four, hold

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for four and just keep, and do, if you do
that for five minutes, that also simulates

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your vagus nerve and calms you down and
brings you down.

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So like there's all these things that you
can do for free.

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You can add it.

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All this stuff and it just, it amazes me
that even you and I, well, in this case, I

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forget about this stuff sometimes and, you
know, look for that cool tech solution.

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And I'm brought back to that one therapist
appointment where I was like, I'm gonna

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try this, I'm gonna try this, I'm gonna
try this, I'm gonna try this.

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She's like, what are you trying to solve?

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And I was like, I don't know.

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I'm just throwing shit at the wall and
seeing what sticks.

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00:15:59,057 --> 00:16:02,443
I'm trying to dissolve this empty pit in
my soul that I can't seem to fill with

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00:16:02,443 --> 00:16:03,713
enough Nutter Butters.

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00:16:03,713 --> 00:16:04,998
Exactly.

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God damn it.

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00:16:06,131 --> 00:16:07,148
Now I want another butter.

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00:16:07,148 --> 00:16:08,706
episode brought to you by Nutter Butter.

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00:16:08,706 --> 00:16:11,307
Alright, well if you're anything like us,
clearly our lives have been a bit of a

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00:16:11,307 --> 00:16:15,929
shit show lately and we're now trying to
clean it up with some extreme tools and

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00:16:15,929 --> 00:16:17,470
some not so extreme tools.

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00:16:17,470 --> 00:16:20,111
Hopefully some of what we've talked about
here has been helpful for you.

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00:16:20,111 --> 00:16:23,122
Or maybe you know somebody who's going
through some similar struggles as those

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00:16:23,122 --> 00:16:24,253
we've described here.

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00:16:24,253 --> 00:16:27,604
If that's the case, please visit our
website, thefitmass .com and share this

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00:16:27,604 --> 00:16:28,915
episode with them today.

329
00:16:28,915 --> 00:16:32,656
That'll really help us accomplish our goal
of reaching out to other people just like

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00:16:32,656 --> 00:16:35,998
us to help them improve their lives and
their mental health as much as possible.

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00:16:35,998 --> 00:16:36,938
Thanks so much for listening.

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00:16:36,938 --> 00:16:38,984
We will be back next week with a brand new

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00:16:38,984 --> 00:16:40,675
at thefitmass .com

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00:16:40,821 --> 00:16:41,284
See you around.